"Gotcha. I'll read up on it, maybe we can find nicer ways to treat him." That did explain everything and it also made him even more protective of Kangwoo. He reached for the fruit basket and pulled out a bunch of bananas, holding them up for Kangwoo to see. "Do you like bananas, Kangwoo?"
"Ohh, bananas." Cow Hobi did love bananas. This was great, he could already tell that breakfast today would be especially good.
"Bananananananananananana." Kangwoo mumbled as he took the banana and looked it over, went to put the whole thing in his mouth to chew but luckily Namjoon stopped him. Kangwoo squealed angrily and whined but Namjoon swiftly unpeeled it for him.
"It's icky otherwise. Don't eat the peel. There you go, much better. Nananananana."
Kangwoo, now satisfied, happily munched on his banana. Namjoon gave Yoongi a look. "How do you plan to tell the boss?"
I'm thinking interpretative dance?" Yoongi shrugged his shoulders and started chopping up the other bananas, while Hobi was singing a banana song for Kangwoo's enjoyment, interspersed with the occasional moo.
That gave Yoongi the time and focus to start frying the egg, while the pancake better had some time to rest. He looked at Namjoon and shrugged once more. "I will just give him the facts and tell him the child is under our protection."
"Uh-oh." Kangwoo had lost some banana on the floor and was flailing at it. Namjoon kept his hand on the boy, prompting Hobi to take over so he could go the other side of Yoongi and watch him make eggs.
"Do you want me and Hobi to watch the baby while you go talk to the boss. I know we're not your first choice but it might shock the boss less." And they could take care of a baby. It was tiny and cute, they got this.
"I wasn't planning on Jimin-ssi ever seeing the baby. He's ours, not his. And he can want him dead if he likes, but then he has to go through me." And that meant going through them. Hobi was currently on the floor looking for a banana, finally holding it up triumphantly with a huge smile.
He quickly got up to rinse it under the tap, then broke a piece off to feed to Kangwoo. "Yummy, yummy, yummy?"
"He's ours then." Namjoon knew what it meant, they were a team and always had been. He worked for Yoongi, not Jimin. They were just hired out by Jimin from time to time for stuff like this. He watched Hobi feed the tiny boy and smiled a little. "We can protect him. No one even knows he's alive and if they do now, they probably assumed we offed him. After all, why would assassins keep a kid?"
Hopefully that would be the end of it. "I'm mostly worried about the Dark Dragons. I don't think Jimin-nim thought this through at all. Now Cheon is looking to take over and that can't be good."
"Jimin-ssi isn't that blessed with great foresight," Yoongi admitted honestly, while flipping the first pancake and turning the heat under the egg pan down, so it could cook evenly and nicely. "Anyway, let me worry about that. I'll discuss it with him, all of that, and then I can give you an update."
Right now he had more urgent worries. "Have either of you ever taken care of a baby?"
"No but it can't be too tricky right. I mean you just sort of hold him and feed him, water him... pet him. Wait, no, hug him." Ha. Nailed it. "I will buy some books, promise. I can get some parenting books on my kindle and do some autism research. Oooh, this could be really fun." He loved the reading part, he was a little unsure about the rest.
He came over to Kangwoo and bopped his nose. "You wanna read with hyungie?"
"Banananananananananananana." Kangwoo chanted as he finished his banana and held out the peel for Namjoon to take. Which he did. Well. Hopefully Hobi had kid experience.
"...well, you got me on speed dial." Yoongi wasn't too hopeful for this. He remembered when they had tried to make pesto, they had treated that like their child too. With a roll of his eyes, Yoongi started on another pancake and looked over at Kangwoo, smiling. "You having a good time with the weird hyungs?"
"The best of times," Hobi assured him. He also wisely started to set the table, to prove his not completely uselessness.
Kangwoo nodded, licking egg and banana goo off his hand. Namjoon wet a cloth and started to clean him up, even if he squirmed and whined the whole time. He didn't want the boy too sticky and gross today. He helped him get clean and then he reached out, picking him up very carefully to try and show Yoongi that he could do it and do it well.
In the end, he was holding the toddler like it was something smelly and gross. Like a muddy football. Not intentionally but it happened. Kangwoo whined, squirming as he looked at Yoongi. This was a weird experience, hence why he looked so unsure. Namjoon was just trying to get him to the table.
"Can he just sit in a normal chair or what? He's kinda short."
"He'll sit on my lap. And come on, how are you holding him?" Yoongi rolled his eyes and wrapped his own arms around Kangwoo, pulling him away from Namjoon. "Your Namjoon-hyung is silly, huh?"
He walked over to the table and sat down, looking over his shoulder at Namjoon. "Get the rice over and we've got kimchi and other pickles in the fridge."
Hobi had already set bananas and pancakes onto the table, so that was a good start. "Kangwoo-ah, do you think you can take care of Hobi and Namjoon today when I go out?"
Kangwoo nodded as he settled himself on Yoongi's lap and then looked around at the table curiously. He had so many things to eat and the table was all big and full of nice people. It was weird. He knew the rules of eating in the morning, he had to eat everything and say thank you, he had to wait to be excused and be quiet during. So he tried his best to fumble with his chopsticks and eat his rice. "Thank you."
"Look me years to master chopsticks." Namjoon admitted as he sat the rest of the stuff down and took a seat, digging into his own pancakes eagerly. "He's doing surprisingly well."
"Do you want hyung to feed you, Kang-ah? It's okay, because you are still little." And to probably not be very helpful here, Hobi turned to Namjoon and opened his mouth expectantly.
He felt he deserved to be fed a bite or two too and Yoongi was busy, so...
Yoongi ignored them, instead focusing on feeding Kangwoo a nice bite of pancakes with banana. "You like the food?"
Namjoon did indeed feed Hobi a bite and then opened his own mouth to get one too. Well, he wasn't going to be left out here. Kangwoo watched the shiny men before opening his own mouth to chew on the pancakes. He swallowed happily and then fumbled with his chopsticks for a few before giving up. "Good food."
Happily, he opened his mouth again for Yoongi to feed him. "I can use chopsticks." He just wanted hyung to know how good he was.
"For real. Namjoonie still struggles." Yoongi was just saying. He fed Kangwoo another bite, smiling at him. "Hyung has to go out, but the silly boys will stay with you. And then when I come home, we can have more food. Maybe we order something."
"Ohh, let's have pizza!" Hobi liked the sound of this, smiling eagerly. He also fed Namjoon another bite and then leaned forward to quickly kiss his cheek. "We get baby time! How cool is that? I can moo more."
There were just rarely opportunities to moo on the assassin job.
"Moo." Kangwoo agreed thoughtfully. He didn't actually get any of this but he was curious and interested in the shiny men and he knew that hyung wouldn't leave. Would he? He said he'd come back and he didn't have to lie so he would. Even if he felt a little anxious at the idea of him leaving. Okay, a lot anxious. "Hyung comes back."
"Of course he will, he just has to go and talk to the boss." Namjoon assured as he ate some bananas off his pancakes and turned to smile at the boy. "We could watch Star Wars while he's gone."
Well, that had the boys attention. They were gonna be the best babysitters ever.
"You watch Star Wars and if there is something wrong, the two can call me on my phone. So it's all good, yeah? And yes, hyung comes back soon." Yoongi linked fingers with Kangwoo as they had before, smiling a little at him. It seemed like the promise thing was working, so he would keep going with it. "Promise."
"Wear tight pants, boss, then Jimin-nim can't get mad." Smart idea, Hobi thought.
"Maybe bend over. Maybe smile at him. Oh man, if you smile at him, he won't even hear what you say." Namjoon teased. The tiny crime lord was so in love with Yoongi, it was precious. Every time Yoongi came to visit, he melt for the assassin and acted like a bashful school boy. Which was a big difference from how he was usually yelling and losing his temper. He was a brat but a cute brat.
And hopefully he wouldn't dare piss Yoongi off over the kid or they'd have some problems. "In all seriousness, when you see him, maybe point out the... you know, consequences. He might not get it."
"Yeah, I'll go over it." Yoongi sighed and then looked at Kangwoo, making a grimace for him and also because he was feeling it. "Hey, Kang-ah. Do you maybe want to wash quickly and then get dressed? Hyung will do that too, then hyung has to go and you and those two can have a fun day together."
He really, really hoped that would go well.
And Hobi squealed joyfully, elbowing Namjoon. "We will get to buy him outfits!"
"Oh my God! Tiny shoes." Namjoon also got excited, clapping his hands. "The ones that light up! And Star Wars ones." All very exciting. Namjoon was already bringing up amazon to look at little outfits while Kangwoo tilted his head to the side, considering what his hyung said.
"Bath before bed?" He was a little confused. He didn't want to go to bed. Or have a bath, truthfully. He shook his head stubbornly and returned to playing with his food. Mostly the fun texture of the banananananana. "No baths." He looked down at his pyjamas and then nodded at the idea of clothes. "Giraffe shirt."
"Hm. All right, so we will have a bath later? Before bed?" Yoongi supposed he could deal with that. "Hyung needs a shower now though, he's smelly." Well, he was a grown ass man and he had just slept a night while cuddling a tiny boy, of course he was smelly. "But the giraffe shirt? All right, sounds dope. Do you want to help pick out hyung's clothes too?"
Kangwoo nodded and slid out of Yoongi's lap, already toddling off to go and look for the right clothes to match his giraffe shirt. Namjoon beamed at Hobi and gripped his arm. "Look at how cutely he walks! He sways a little. He's like an adorable baby drunk."
Once in the room they slept in, Kangwoo wandered around and started to open drawers. And, like most kids, he was specially fascinated in Yoongi's pants and socks. Hence why he mostly picked out two undies, four pairs of socks and one t-shirt that was also yellow like his giraffe shirt. Then he started chewing on some jeans.
"...huh." Well, he would have trouble wearing all of that at once. "We really need to get you something you can chew, huh? I better tell the shopaholics that." Yoongi sat down next to Kangwoo on the floor, picking out the chosen clothing items that he would actually be able to wear at once. He supposed he could wear a yellow shirt, match with Kangwoo for the day.
"If there is anything you need, you let those two know, yeah? They really like shopping."
Kangwoo nodded his head but he wasn't going to ask for anything. It seemed like a lot. He held out the jeans he picked and flailed them in the air so Yoongi didn't miss them. Then he started to awkwardly take off his own clothes. It was hard but he did it with a lot of whining and whimpering because the shirt lightly brushed his ears and upset him a lot.
He sat there, happily naked, looking up at hyung. "Giraffe shirt and blue shorts." He didn't have an opinion on the underwear, he didn't much care for underwear himself. He felt it was better served as a fetching hat than on his butt.
"Okay. But first you need underwear too." Yoongi looked through the bag he had so helpfully packed yesterday, offering a pair of underwear out to Kangwoo. "Do you need help?" He had already found the giraffe shirt, so at least he was making progress.
"You will look soooo cute in that outfit, Kang-ah, the others are going to melt. You'll see, they will yell, like silly boys."
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"Ohh, bananas." Cow Hobi did love bananas. This was great, he could already tell that breakfast today would be especially good.
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"It's icky otherwise. Don't eat the peel. There you go, much better. Nananananana."
Kangwoo, now satisfied, happily munched on his banana. Namjoon gave Yoongi a look. "How do you plan to tell the boss?"
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That gave Yoongi the time and focus to start frying the egg, while the pancake better had some time to rest. He looked at Namjoon and shrugged once more. "I will just give him the facts and tell him the child is under our protection."
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"Uh-oh." Kangwoo had lost some banana on the floor and was flailing at it. Namjoon kept his hand on the boy, prompting Hobi to take over so he could go the other side of Yoongi and watch him make eggs.
"Do you want me and Hobi to watch the baby while you go talk to the boss. I know we're not your first choice but it might shock the boss less." And they could take care of a baby. It was tiny and cute, they got this.
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He quickly got up to rinse it under the tap, then broke a piece off to feed to Kangwoo. "Yummy, yummy, yummy?"
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Hopefully that would be the end of it. "I'm mostly worried about the Dark Dragons. I don't think Jimin-nim thought this through at all. Now Cheon is looking to take over and that can't be good."
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Right now he had more urgent worries. "Have either of you ever taken care of a baby?"
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He came over to Kangwoo and bopped his nose. "You wanna read with hyungie?"
"Banananananananananananana." Kangwoo chanted as he finished his banana and held out the peel for Namjoon to take. Which he did. Well. Hopefully Hobi had kid experience.
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"The best of times," Hobi assured him. He also wisely started to set the table, to prove his not completely uselessness.
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In the end, he was holding the toddler like it was something smelly and gross. Like a muddy football. Not intentionally but it happened. Kangwoo whined, squirming as he looked at Yoongi. This was a weird experience, hence why he looked so unsure. Namjoon was just trying to get him to the table.
"Can he just sit in a normal chair or what? He's kinda short."
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He walked over to the table and sat down, looking over his shoulder at Namjoon. "Get the rice over and we've got kimchi and other pickles in the fridge."
Hobi had already set bananas and pancakes onto the table, so that was a good start. "Kangwoo-ah, do you think you can take care of Hobi and Namjoon today when I go out?"
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"Look me years to master chopsticks." Namjoon admitted as he sat the rest of the stuff down and took a seat, digging into his own pancakes eagerly. "He's doing surprisingly well."
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He felt he deserved to be fed a bite or two too and Yoongi was busy, so...
Yoongi ignored them, instead focusing on feeding Kangwoo a nice bite of pancakes with banana. "You like the food?"
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Happily, he opened his mouth again for Yoongi to feed him. "I can use chopsticks." He just wanted hyung to know how good he was.
"Woah, so cool! You're a genius, Kang-ah."
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"Ohh, let's have pizza!" Hobi liked the sound of this, smiling eagerly. He also fed Namjoon another bite and then leaned forward to quickly kiss his cheek. "We get baby time! How cool is that? I can moo more."
There were just rarely opportunities to moo on the assassin job.
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"Of course he will, he just has to go and talk to the boss." Namjoon assured as he ate some bananas off his pancakes and turned to smile at the boy. "We could watch Star Wars while he's gone."
Well, that had the boys attention. They were gonna be the best babysitters ever.
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"Wear tight pants, boss, then Jimin-nim can't get mad." Smart idea, Hobi thought.
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And hopefully he wouldn't dare piss Yoongi off over the kid or they'd have some problems. "In all seriousness, when you see him, maybe point out the... you know, consequences. He might not get it."
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He really, really hoped that would go well.
And Hobi squealed joyfully, elbowing Namjoon. "We will get to buy him outfits!"
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"Bath before bed?" He was a little confused. He didn't want to go to bed. Or have a bath, truthfully. He shook his head stubbornly and returned to playing with his food. Mostly the fun texture of the banananananana. "No baths." He looked down at his pyjamas and then nodded at the idea of clothes. "Giraffe shirt."
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Hey, he figured he might as well offer.
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Once in the room they slept in, Kangwoo wandered around and started to open drawers. And, like most kids, he was specially fascinated in Yoongi's pants and socks. Hence why he mostly picked out two undies, four pairs of socks and one t-shirt that was also yellow like his giraffe shirt. Then he started chewing on some jeans.
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"If there is anything you need, you let those two know, yeah? They really like shopping."
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He sat there, happily naked, looking up at hyung. "Giraffe shirt and blue shorts." He didn't have an opinion on the underwear, he didn't much care for underwear himself. He felt it was better served as a fetching hat than on his butt.
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"You will look soooo cute in that outfit, Kang-ah, the others are going to melt. You'll see, they will yell, like silly boys."
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