In some ways, Jimin had a sort of immature way of handling negative emotions. Yoongi wouldn't really see him, he didn't really talk to him and he was being dismissive a lot lately. Especially tonight. He came over with a special drink and everything, he just got shooed away because Namjoon was there. He was embarrassed of him! That's what it looked like. He pouted for a solid fifteen minutes behind the bar.
"Hey, handsome, can you pour me another whiskey?"
Jimin turned his head and -- oh. He smiled bashfully and wondered if Yoongi would pay attention to him if he made him pay attention. "Coming right up!" He poured a glass of whiskey and slid it over, reaching out to stroke his arm up and down. Musclely. "You come here often? I would have remembered someone as good looking as you."
Ha! This would teach Yoongi to ignore him and talk to Namjoon instead.
Yoongi was mostly focusing on what Namjoon was telling him, nodding along. They had been very busy lately, having to sort out all the new property they were taking over, finding the right men and trying to maintain strength while expanding. Not an easy task by any means and he looked at the profiles of the various men that were on the table in front of him.
Still, he glanced toward the bar for just a moment, hoping for a glimpse of Jimin, hoping that maybe the earrings would catch the light the way they sometimes did, because he liked the idea of having made Jimin sparkle for him. What he saw instead wasn't that moment of joy he'd been hoping for, instead his chest tightened.
"Who's that?" He gestured to the bar. "Talking to Jimin."
"Wha-- Oh, that guy?" Namjoon turned his head and watched Jimin giggle at whatever the guy said and hit him arm lightly. Clearly flirting. He wasn't even shocked, that kid had pull and this probably wasn't the first guy to hit on him. "He's a brawler who works for us. Good guy, horny as hell. Probably looking for a quick lay."
Namjoon clearly didn't think it mattered too much, he shrugged his shoulders and looked elsewhere.
"Do you work out? You look like you work out." Jimin giggled bashfully and the guy nodded, flexing for Jimin while he reached out to poke his muscle. "Oooh, so strong!"
Yoongi felt his hand twitch, wanting to go for his gun. Right. He wanted to go for his gun and shoot a good man that worked for him in the head, because Jimin was touching him. Jimin, who was really nothing to him, at least officially. He knew that Jimin was doing this on purpose, trying to get to him, and that only made it worse.
So much for not playing.
He forced his hand into a fist and looked back onto the table, trying to get a grip of himself.
"All right. I have a problem." He needed to check himself somehow.
Namjoon frowned and looked up, unsure what the problem was. Was it him? He didn't think so. He hadn't done anything wrong. He hoped. "What's up?" Did he not like the guy at the bar? God, his name was escaping him. He turned around and Jimin was leaning half over the bar, doing that whole adorable puppy act. He was a cute kid, was it bothering Yoongi?
Oh, shit, was this the thing Kookie talked about?
"Wait, are you bothered by Jimin?"
Jimin's laugh was loud enough to hear across the room and Namjoon looked back to see the kid beaming at the guy and reaching out to play with his tie. Such a flirt.
"That's what he wants." Yoongi closed his eyes and counted to... he was going to go for ten, but he decided to fuck it with the counting halfway in. "He's playing me."
Fuck this. He couldn't let this kind of stuff bother him. He already saw flashes of past relationships he had had, of violent outbursts, breaking down into tears, a whole lot of mess that he really wanted to have left behind him, but here he was and he didn't even know if he could trust himself right now.
"Can you take my gun?" He wasn't walking over there with his gun, not when he felt like this.
"Give it to me." Oh boy, his boss had problems. He took the gun from Yoongi and unloaded it, putting the bullets in one pocket and the gun in the other. "Look, he's still young and he's probably just bored, don't get too worked up. Everyone is dumb at his age." Twenty might be adult but it was still an age of fucking up. He turned his head and watched Jimin.
Did the kid even know who he was provoking?
Jimin had come around the bar, having his break now as he sat in the stool next to the guy and just talked to him. He was mostly just asking about his job and where he lived but deep down, he was wondering if Yoongi was watching -- did he even care?
"I know. I'm still dumb." Obviously. He'd thought he'd grown out of that age. He stood up, giving a wave to his bodyguards not to bother. He so did not need to add people to this mess. Yoongi put his shades on, hoping that his heart would stop beating so loudly. So much anger and no proper target to direct it toward.
Walking over he stopped by the stool Jimin was sitting at, barely even acknowledging the man he was talking to, even when he bowed, respectfully muttering his name. He hated him currently, he'd have to get over that later.
"I-- okay?" Yoongi looked mad. Oh... Oh no, had he made a mistake? He didn't want to die over this, he was just bored and he wanted to flirt. A pretty guy hit on him! And it wasn't like Yoongi was his boyfriend or anything. Yoongi was just this guy who was nice to him sometimes and then ghosted him around his friends.
Getting up from the stool, he turned his head back to look over at Namjoon but the other was busy drinking beer. "Where are we going? My break ends soon."
"Do I look like I give a fuck?" Yoongi didn't wait for an answer, he just walked off towards the stairs, clearly expecting Jimin to just follow him. He walked all the way up to J-Hope's office. He'd seen him downstairs before, he knew it was empty. He opened the door and held it, looking at Jimin. "Get in."
Obviously Jimin was going to go in either way, he just ordered him to do it because he could. A little reminder about power structure didn't seem like the worst idea.
Jimin had no idea what was happening but Yoongi had a very harsh tone and Jimin didn't know if he should be terrified or turned on. He didn't even know how dangerous this was. Tae once said that Yoongi didn't seem like the kind of guy who'd hurt him but he'd thought that about guys before and been proved wrong. Was Yoongi about to turn on him like Cheon had or was this just him being annoyed at him?
"Are you mad at me, hyung?" Jimin bit his lower lip and tried his best to look submissive and emphatic. "You seem upset."
"You want me to be mad." Yoongi let the door fall shut behind him, not bothering with turning on the light. There was a huge window and there was a lot of neon lettering on the outside of the club, it was light enough. Tinted a little red, but he thought that was appropriate. He finally took his shades off, slipping them into his jacket, no longer worried that someone else could see how he felt. "Now you got what you wanted. Happy?"
"No." Not overly, he would be happy if he hadn't had to it in the first place. He didn't have fun doing it. "I-- we're not dating, hyung. You won't entertain the idea. So why I can't I talk to other boys and have fun? I can't stay alone forever!" He didn't want to. Tae would eventually find someone, he was already drifting a little. He had Namjoon and Jungkook, he had things going on. Jimin had this. Whatever this is. "If you want me then do something about it!"
He hoped that something wasn't murder. "I can be a good boy, you know I can."
"Do what you want, Jimin, but that wasn't what you were doing. You weren't talking to the nice guy because you wanted to talk to the nice guy. You were talking to him because you wanted me to notice." Yoongi paused, just in case Jimin wanted to deny it, then reached out to put a hand on Jimin's shoulder. His touch was softer than he would have expected himself. Damn, he was so weak for this boy. He moved his fingers until he could trace them along Jimin's neck. "You said you wouldn't play me."
"You were ignoring me." He didn't know how to react to it. He had so many emotions for Yoongi and he wasn't allowed to express any of them. He flinched under Yoongi's touch but it turned out to be soft, gentle and relaxing in it's own way. Jimin looked Yoongi up and down, wishing he could do something to get through to him. "I'm not allowed to touch you, I'm not allowed to be close to you and I'm not allowed to play. What do I get for doing all of this?" Ignored because Namjoon was there. And dismissed because he was always too busy.
"What do you think I could give you aside from that?" Yoongi tried not to think about how much he wanted to kiss him. It wasn't conductive to actually having a discussion. "I don't show emotions in public. I won't start for you. People wait for weakness. I'm not very strong, do you know that?"
He smiled ruefully, shaking his head. "You probably don't even realise. Do you know that you're the first one who's seen me cry since... Hell, I don't even know. It's been a very long time. I won't show emotions, because people can't know how weak I am. Not just my enemies. My people too. Probably even more so. They are all ready to give their lives for me. I have to seem like I'm worth that. Do you get that? I have to be untouchable."
"No one will see you right now. You could do anything to me... who would ever see it?" Jimin didn't think they could have a relationship, it seemed doomed but sometimes he looked at Yoongi and all he wanted to do was having him, to surrender to him and do whatever it took, even if it was just for a scrap of love. "You're very strong and very clever, hyung. Use them both for something you'd enjoy for once, instead of just business."
Jimin boldly dropped down onto his knees, looking up at Yoongi with desperate eyes. He wished he could get through to them. "I don't need to be public, I just need you to want me, to touch me, to be with me sometimes! That's enough."
Yoongi's eyes widened and he took a step back, staring down at Jimin, entirely unsure what to do with that. He swallowed as he looked at him, trying to get his mind to focus on anything other than that. "I want you to know that I gave Namjoon my gun before coming here. Because I don't always trust myself, but I don't want to hurt you. This is bound to hurt you."
One way or another. Probably in the worse ways. "You know that I want you, Jimin. You must know that. I think about you when I touch myself."
If they were being bold, he wasn't going to fall behind.
"I don't think you'll hurt me. I've known men that hurt me, they always show it in their eyes, even before they do it. You don't have that in you. I know you're ruthless and dangerous but not when you love." That was just his theory. And maybe Yoongi was destructive and bad at dating, he didn't know, but he really didn't think he'd hurt him. He licked his lips and looked up at Yoongi, seductive and playful, batting those eyelids.
"Let me touch, I can give you something worth remember for when you next touch yourself." He could do that. The smallest validation was enough. "Please, just let me love you. Even if it's just this once."
Yoongi kept looking down at Jimin, because how could he not, letting several moments pass before finally - and with great reluctance - shaking his head. Instead he got onto his knees himself, not even bothering with imagining anyone seeing them right now. He leaned in, getting his hand tangled in Jimin's hair, and rested their foreheads against each other, his eyes closing.
"I don't want that, Jimin." Oh, he wanted that. "If I'm going to have you, I want all of you."
"You do?" Why? He was good at what he did, he didn't want Yoongi to feel obligated... or maybe he just really wanted him. There was a soft smile on his face as he leaned in and nuzzled against Yoongi, feeling tears build up in his eyes. "I want to be yours. Please, Yoongi, let me be yours. I won't let anyone, it'll be our secret." He didn't mind that, as long as he got to be with him. To be loved and wanted on some level.
"I won't even tell Tae. It'll be just for us. Our happiness, no one else has to know."
Yoongi nodded, mostly because he wasn't sure whether he trusted himself to speak. At least not speak while sounding anything like he wanted to sound. Finally he just kissed Jimin and it wasn't anything like the kisses he had imagined, he wasn't pinning him against anything, he wasn't trying to take his breath away. He just kissed him once, then kissed him again, his arms around him as it just ended in a series of little kisses.
Every kiss was wonderful and Jimin had no shame, he was crying openly and he was happy. He wanted this, he wanted someone to love him, he wanted to be close to people. He broke into a smile and pulled him into another kiss, wrapping his arms around him and snuggling in close. "I'm going to miss you when we leave this room, even if we're a short distance apart. But it'll be okay cause I'll get you again soon."
"I'll make time to come by tomorrow." He would just have to, somehow. Yoongi was already trying to mentally change his schedule, but whatever. He could juggle things around if it meant that Jimin would smile at him like this. He held him in his arms and tried to prepare himself to leave the room, but it was difficult after he'd stripped himself down from all defences. He didn't want to go back out, he just knew he had to. "Maybe I'll bring you another gift."
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"Hey, handsome, can you pour me another whiskey?"
Jimin turned his head and -- oh. He smiled bashfully and wondered if Yoongi would pay attention to him if he made him pay attention. "Coming right up!" He poured a glass of whiskey and slid it over, reaching out to stroke his arm up and down. Musclely. "You come here often? I would have remembered someone as good looking as you."
Ha! This would teach Yoongi to ignore him and talk to Namjoon instead.
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Still, he glanced toward the bar for just a moment, hoping for a glimpse of Jimin, hoping that maybe the earrings would catch the light the way they sometimes did, because he liked the idea of having made Jimin sparkle for him. What he saw instead wasn't that moment of joy he'd been hoping for, instead his chest tightened.
"Who's that?" He gestured to the bar. "Talking to Jimin."
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Namjoon clearly didn't think it mattered too much, he shrugged his shoulders and looked elsewhere.
"Do you work out? You look like you work out." Jimin giggled bashfully and the guy nodded, flexing for Jimin while he reached out to poke his muscle. "Oooh, so strong!"
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So much for not playing.
He forced his hand into a fist and looked back onto the table, trying to get a grip of himself.
"All right. I have a problem." He needed to check himself somehow.
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Oh, shit, was this the thing Kookie talked about?
"Wait, are you bothered by Jimin?"
Jimin's laugh was loud enough to hear across the room and Namjoon looked back to see the kid beaming at the guy and reaching out to play with his tie. Such a flirt.
"I can stop them... I guess?"
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Fuck this. He couldn't let this kind of stuff bother him. He already saw flashes of past relationships he had had, of violent outbursts, breaking down into tears, a whole lot of mess that he really wanted to have left behind him, but here he was and he didn't even know if he could trust himself right now.
"Can you take my gun?" He wasn't walking over there with his gun, not when he felt like this.
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Did the kid even know who he was provoking?
Jimin had come around the bar, having his break now as he sat in the stool next to the guy and just talked to him. He was mostly just asking about his job and where he lived but deep down, he was wondering if Yoongi was watching -- did he even care?
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Walking over he stopped by the stool Jimin was sitting at, barely even acknowledging the man he was talking to, even when he bowed, respectfully muttering his name. He hated him currently, he'd have to get over that later.
For now he focused on Jimin. "Come with me."
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Getting up from the stool, he turned his head back to look over at Namjoon but the other was busy drinking beer. "Where are we going? My break ends soon."
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Obviously Jimin was going to go in either way, he just ordered him to do it because he could. A little reminder about power structure didn't seem like the worst idea.
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"Are you mad at me, hyung?" Jimin bit his lower lip and tried his best to look submissive and emphatic. "You seem upset."
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He hoped that something wasn't murder. "I can be a good boy, you know I can."
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He smiled ruefully, shaking his head. "You probably don't even realise. Do you know that you're the first one who's seen me cry since... Hell, I don't even know. It's been a very long time. I won't show emotions, because people can't know how weak I am. Not just my enemies. My people too. Probably even more so. They are all ready to give their lives for me. I have to seem like I'm worth that. Do you get that? I have to be untouchable."
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Jimin boldly dropped down onto his knees, looking up at Yoongi with desperate eyes. He wished he could get through to them. "I don't need to be public, I just need you to want me, to touch me, to be with me sometimes! That's enough."
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One way or another. Probably in the worse ways. "You know that I want you, Jimin. You must know that. I think about you when I touch myself."
If they were being bold, he wasn't going to fall behind.
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"Let me touch, I can give you something worth remember for when you next touch yourself." He could do that. The smallest validation was enough. "Please, just let me love you. Even if it's just this once."
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"I don't want that, Jimin." Oh, he wanted that. "If I'm going to have you, I want all of you."
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"I won't even tell Tae. It'll be just for us. Our happiness, no one else has to know."
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