"I know Ten, yeah." Yoongi frowned, thinking about Ten. Damn. This was weird, why would Ten go through Namjoon? Oh. Right. Because the last several times Ten had invited him to hang out anywhere outside of school and basketball, he hadn't shown up. That explained it. Still, it irked him to have Namjoon used against him, made him feel as if there was a weakness being exploited. "We play ball together sometimes. He's good."
At basketball, anyway. Otherwise it was debatable. Yoongi turned to look at Namjoon, watching his face. "Do you want to go? Non-consensual fondling aside."
"I don't know. I'm not a party guy but I do like free booze." He really liked anything free, really. He could probably nap himself a snack there too, raid the fridge... he was always thinking of cheap ways to eat. His dad was a deadbeat loser, not that he'd ever tell Yoongi that. He always just described him as 'distant' cause cool kids had distant parents they struggled to connect with. A problem commonly faced by teens today.
"I might go but I can't go unless you go so it really depends on if you want to go." He basically didn't get a say but that was okay. If he couldn't go, he could live with it. "If not, we can just go to yours and finish writing our mix tape."
"We can go." Namjoon sometimes fretted about his social standing and being at one of the cool kids' parties might help it, so whatever. "We don't have to stay long if it sucks."
And maybe drinking a little bit might give him some courage to figure things out. Because sometimes, sometimes he was certain that Namjoon had to feel the way he did. When their eyes met and sometimes when they talked about relationships or about music. Maybe a different environment would help set it free.
"If my parents don't need me to look after Kookie, anyway. How do you know Ten, do you get along?"
Did Ten hit on Namjoon too? Because he didn't think he would be okay with that.
"We're both the top students in language so we did a lot of organisation for the exchange program for extra credit. I thought he was a dumbass but he speaks four languages... which makes him failing English and Korea, two languages he's fluent in, all the more baffling." Well, it wasn't that baffling. Ten had terrible attendance and when he did turn up, he just flirted with whatever handsome boy had his attention. Sure, he got a lot of shit for it but guys like Ten had a way of just owning their differences.
Namjoon found it interesting. How did Ten survival and every little mistake he made got his ass kicked? It was so weird.
"I wouldn't say we get along. I'm pretty sure he's a demon child."
"Demon child?" Yoongi laughed, he couldn't help it. Sometimes, hell, often, Namjoon just said the strangest things. "I don't think he's satanic. He's pretty nice. Good baller."
The flirting could be odd, but he figured there were worse things than having his big dick constantly praised. Awkward as hell, but at least it was nothing to be ashamed of. Still, he didn't want Namjoon to think that he wanted to be with Ten. No, he really didn't want Namjoon to think that.
"I wouldn't want to date him, but he seems like a good guy."
"Why would you date him? You'd have to be gay to date him. He's the gay one. He only likes boys, I know that much, I think we all do." Namjoon laughed as he reached down, checking how damp his pants were. Ah. Much better. He looked normal now, he peered down with a smile. "He's always flirting. Not with me! But with all the other handsome guys in our class."
He supposed he never really thought it through a lot but there were a lot of handsome guys in their year. "I don't blame him. If I liked men, I'd be spoiled for choice."
Was that a weird thing to say? Well. Whatever. He shrugged his shoulders.
Yoongi's heart was beating a bit too fast and he hoped he still looked casual. He probably did, he'd gotten very good at hiding how he felt over the years, mostly to hide how nervous he was half the time. Right now? Definitely nerves too, but maybe in a different way than usual.
"Yeah?" He swallowed, trying not to seem too interested, as if the answer didn't matter to him. "Who do you think are the handsome guys? If you liked men."
"I don't know, do I? I just said. They are handsome. Doesn't mean I think exactly who, when and why. Usually I just find them annoying. So many idiots." Namjoon sighed wearily, dramatically, shaking his head and pretending to grasp his heart. "I can't handle the amount of idiot boys. They say such stupid things. One of them asked if a prime number was just a number that was in charge."
Shaking his head, Namjoon huffed out a laugh and held the door open for Yoongi so they could have a wander outside.
"It's an objective thing, yeah? Like you see their abs and chest after gym and you're like, yeah, no, he's hot but I don't personally think he's hot. Even if his chest is glistening, he's a dumbass." Just saying. "And a dude."
Yoongi walked outside, casually lifting his shirt up while he was with his back to Namjoon to check on his stomach. Abs? Well. At least it was flat and he supposed there was some definition going on, but he couldn't compete with some guys in their class in this department.
He realised some girls were looking over at him and giggling and let go of his shirt, putting his hand in his pocket instead as he turned around again. Such a let-down. But no, he couldn't give up so easily, not when he had such an opportunity.
"It's a thought experiment. We can just go over the boys in our class and check them off."
Namjoon loved experiments and lists. This ought to work.
"Yeah but it's kinda gay, don't you think? Working out which guy is the hottest." Namjoon remarked as he climbed up onto the wall and walked along it, one foot after the other, having a good time outside instead of stuck in class. He smiled to himself as he idly considered what Yoongi was suggesting. "Are we both doing the experiment or just me because then we'd need more opinions and then a blind control, so someone from another school, to come in and check we don't all have a bias."
If they were working out the hottest guy, of course.
"If it's just subjective then it's only what I think and then it seems pointless." He jumped off the wall and idly considered the question as he walked along. "If I had to pick? Choi Daejung is exceptionally handsome."
"Yeah, he is." He looked nothing like him. Yoongi felt a crushing weight on his chest and tried to pretend that it wasn't there. He had both of his hands in his pockets by now, secretly making a fist. What had he even been expecting, Namjoon to suddenly tell him how hot he was and then it would all fall into place magically?
This whole thing was getting out of hand. It was stupid anyway, it wasn't as if he thought of himself as the hottest guy in class. Not even near the top. This had been such a dumb idea, but since he'd gone down this far, he figured he could be daring.
"No, I'm not. I'm very low down, looks wise. If we're going by science. Which I assume we are. I don't have a lot of symmetry. Daejung is around a nine out of ten for that. It's impressive. I bet you could half his face and double it, you wouldn't notice." Namjoon mused as he turned around to look at Yoongi, unsure why this was their conversation topic but apparently today he want to explore the male body. "I don't think I'd ever want to date a guy like him though. He's kind of a jerk."
It was interesting, actually, to consider. "You could a lot of research into that. Good looks doesn't always equal the most dateable, you know?"
Just because someone was hot didn't guarantee they'd mate for life. "I would sooner date someone more my style, not the most handsome. You know? Like same interests, same taste in books, probably not looking like Daejung cause... it'd be weird to date a guy with a face like that."
All right, that was just weird all around. It wasn't as if he went around thinking he was the hottest guy ever, but thinking of someone wanting to date him specifically because he wasn't that hot was strange too. Really, he much preferred Ten's flirting to this. Not that Namjoon was flirting. Not that Namjoon had even the slightest idea what was going on inside Yoongi's mind.
"So then you'd want the same things in a guy that you'd want in a girl, right? Not that much of a difference either way."
"I guess. I don't really know. Why are you asking me? ... You're not going to sign me up to a dating site, are you? Because I know you said I need to get out more but it's weird to get out more to date strangers." Was this about his new 4th generation ant colony because that was a great project and he was not giving it up - it was literally the best thing he'd ever owned. "I don't think about this stuff, I guess."
He was a lot more forth coming discussing men than he was discussing women, admittedly, but then it was just hard to discuss this in general.
"If I dated, I wouldn't have any time to hang out with you, we'd never finish our mix tape and I'd probably rap less. It's be a disaster! Honestly, unless I'm dating you, it just wouldn't be practical." Just saying.
"You're right. Best to be practical." Yoongi smiled a bit, figuring he might as well end this on the note that subtly suggested that they should be dating, even though this really just cemented that all he thought about Namjoon and him even remotely feeling the same was bullshit.
Fuck. He remembered turning his head while sitting next to Namjoon and listening to music, their bodies almost touching. He'd thought they'd kiss any moment and there had been such electricity as he looked into Namjoon's eyes. All in his head.
"Maybe we'll find someone to date at that party though. You never know."
"Nah, probably not. Maybe you can. You're handsome, you could find anyone you want." Namjoon remarked idly as he adjusted his ear piece and then leaned in against Yoongi, happily listening to the music and thinking about how cool it'd be when they were proper artists themselves. They had it all planned out, they just needed to finish the mixtape.
"I know you think your height and beautiful legs scares off women but I think your charm distracts them. You'd get laid like that." He snapped his fingers. "Lucky bastard."
"Yeah. I'm real lucky." Yoongi sighed, shaking his head and kicking a pebble. Wasn't the pebble's fault, but his own self-esteem had been kicked enough for one day, so he had to outsource the pain a little. "Do you want to meet up before we go to the party? What times does it start, anyway?"
He would give it a try at the party. One last honest try. And then he'd force himself to move on, because he couldn't keep this up.
"Yeah, we'll write more." Namjoon grinned at him, nodding his head before looking at Yoongi suddenly, frowning as he cocked his head to the side. He looked right into his eyes. "Your eyes are nice today. Are you wearing contacts? They shimmer." He leaned in and honest to God, it looked like he was going to kiss Yoongi. Instead, he leaned forward and shot after his seat, rushing ahead to some boys who'd dropped their plastic bottle.
"Hey! Do you not care about the ocean? What is wrong with you? The bin is right there!"
Yoongi dropped back, staring up at the sky as it went a little blurry before realising that those were tears in his eyes. Oh, hell, no. He was better than that. Why did Namjoon do this to him?
He got up while his friend was busy berating some guy and headed inside, figuring he should take a breather in the boys' bathroom.
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At basketball, anyway. Otherwise it was debatable. Yoongi turned to look at Namjoon, watching his face. "Do you want to go? Non-consensual fondling aside."
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"I might go but I can't go unless you go so it really depends on if you want to go." He basically didn't get a say but that was okay. If he couldn't go, he could live with it. "If not, we can just go to yours and finish writing our mix tape."
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And maybe drinking a little bit might give him some courage to figure things out. Because sometimes, sometimes he was certain that Namjoon had to feel the way he did. When their eyes met and sometimes when they talked about relationships or about music. Maybe a different environment would help set it free.
"If my parents don't need me to look after Kookie, anyway. How do you know Ten, do you get along?"
Did Ten hit on Namjoon too? Because he didn't think he would be okay with that.
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Namjoon found it interesting. How did Ten survival and every little mistake he made got his ass kicked? It was so weird.
"I wouldn't say we get along. I'm pretty sure he's a demon child."
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The flirting could be odd, but he figured there were worse things than having his big dick constantly praised. Awkward as hell, but at least it was nothing to be ashamed of. Still, he didn't want Namjoon to think that he wanted to be with Ten. No, he really didn't want Namjoon to think that.
"I wouldn't want to date him, but he seems like a good guy."
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He supposed he never really thought it through a lot but there were a lot of handsome guys in their year. "I don't blame him. If I liked men, I'd be spoiled for choice."
Was that a weird thing to say? Well. Whatever. He shrugged his shoulders.
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Yoongi's heart was beating a bit too fast and he hoped he still looked casual. He probably did, he'd gotten very good at hiding how he felt over the years, mostly to hide how nervous he was half the time. Right now? Definitely nerves too, but maybe in a different way than usual.
"Yeah?" He swallowed, trying not to seem too interested, as if the answer didn't matter to him. "Who do you think are the handsome guys? If you liked men."
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Shaking his head, Namjoon huffed out a laugh and held the door open for Yoongi so they could have a wander outside.
"It's an objective thing, yeah? Like you see their abs and chest after gym and you're like, yeah, no, he's hot but I don't personally think he's hot. Even if his chest is glistening, he's a dumbass." Just saying. "And a dude."
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He realised some girls were looking over at him and giggling and let go of his shirt, putting his hand in his pocket instead as he turned around again. Such a let-down. But no, he couldn't give up so easily, not when he had such an opportunity.
"It's a thought experiment. We can just go over the boys in our class and check them off."
Namjoon loved experiments and lists. This ought to work.
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If they were working out the hottest guy, of course.
"If it's just subjective then it's only what I think and then it seems pointless." He jumped off the wall and idly considered the question as he walked along. "If I had to pick? Choi Daejung is exceptionally handsome."
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This whole thing was getting out of hand. It was stupid anyway, it wasn't as if he thought of himself as the hottest guy in class. Not even near the top. This had been such a dumb idea, but since he'd gone down this far, he figured he could be daring.
"You are pretty handsome too, you know?"
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It was interesting, actually, to consider. "You could a lot of research into that. Good looks doesn't always equal the most dateable, you know?"
Just because someone was hot didn't guarantee they'd mate for life. "I would sooner date someone more my style, not the most handsome. You know? Like same interests, same taste in books, probably not looking like Daejung cause... it'd be weird to date a guy with a face like that."
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All right, that was just weird all around. It wasn't as if he went around thinking he was the hottest guy ever, but thinking of someone wanting to date him specifically because he wasn't that hot was strange too. Really, he much preferred Ten's flirting to this. Not that Namjoon was flirting. Not that Namjoon had even the slightest idea what was going on inside Yoongi's mind.
"So then you'd want the same things in a guy that you'd want in a girl, right? Not that much of a difference either way."
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He was a lot more forth coming discussing men than he was discussing women, admittedly, but then it was just hard to discuss this in general.
"If I dated, I wouldn't have any time to hang out with you, we'd never finish our mix tape and I'd probably rap less. It's be a disaster! Honestly, unless I'm dating you, it just wouldn't be practical." Just saying.
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Fuck. He remembered turning his head while sitting next to Namjoon and listening to music, their bodies almost touching. He'd thought they'd kiss any moment and there had been such electricity as he looked into Namjoon's eyes. All in his head.
"Maybe we'll find someone to date at that party though. You never know."
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"I know you think your height and beautiful legs scares off women but I think your charm distracts them. You'd get laid like that." He snapped his fingers. "Lucky bastard."
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He would give it a try at the party. One last honest try. And then he'd force himself to move on, because he couldn't keep this up.
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"Hey! Do you not care about the ocean? What is wrong with you? The bin is right there!"
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He got up while his friend was busy berating some guy and headed inside, figuring he should take a breather in the boys' bathroom.