"He raised me to be his executioner. I guess part of me has known that for a while. He never wanted to care for me in any other way and he didn't. As he told me, this isn't something you do to someone you care for." Yoongi wished he could have talked more about that with him. His father really had been the only person to actually understand his life and his father was gone.
He shrugged and nodded his head. "Sure. You can meet Jungkook. He'll be glad to find out I have friends."
"He could maybe some visit. I won't say what happened. We could just say ... I got hit by a car. Kids are dumb, he won't overthink it." He'll just have a good warning about road safety so that was something? He smiled at Yoongi and ducked his head a little, just trying to get his head around everything.
"You know, your dad had his reasons. I'm sure he cared... he was holding them back, I know he was. We both know what your dad can do in a torture session. He played nice." And yet, it was still painful.
"Well. He wanted you to be able to work with me still. And I think he liked you." That was a different matter. He could allow himself to like Namjoon. Namjoon wasn't Yoongi. Just as he could like Jungkook. Love Jungkook. Yoongi wasn't bitter over it. "I'm glad that my brother was loved. Is loved. And sure, I can bring him by, if I can fit it in. You okay here, yeah? With Hobi?"
"Yeah. He'd decided to make me love him... it's been intense but okay." Namjoon shrugged a little, he knew what Hobi was trying to do and it was torture in some ways but it did take his mind off his misery. "He and Ten had karaoke in my room last night, they sang the greatest hits of G-Dragon and then some broadway hits."
"So, did you join in? Because I bet you'd sound amazing." Yoongi smiled, a bit easier now. Karaoke had been fun, a little bit the foundation of their initial friendship with Ten. So maybe that was what they were going for. Good. He hoped with time Namjoon could learn to appreciate that. "Hobi saved you, you know? I don't know if he's told you, but without you, I don't know if I could have pulled it off. I owe him, big time. I am picking out an expensive present for him."
"I didn't join in. I was kind of exhausted. Also I don't know a lot about Big Bang. I kind of missed out on music." Cause he forgot to pay attention, sure. He considered what Yoongi said and then hugged himself a little. "I appreciate it. That he helped me, even if he was paid to do it. I was always a jerk to him but... I was so jealous of him. He was so happy and free, he just got to be with you."
And that was all Namjoon wanted too. "I wanted that freedom."
"He would have helped you even without music." Yoongi wanted Namjoon to know that. Hobi was a good guy. No matter how Namjoon felt about him. "I wanted you to have that freedom too. I'm sorry I never managed to give you that."
Yoongi smiled a little. "Puberty on the Streets, huh?" He had tried, though he probably hadn't tried hard enough. Namjoon had been so stubborn. Had hated that he had to leave, had hated that Yoongi enjoyed so much of the experience and had resented his friends. "If it helps, he's not going to get to be with me again. You, however, might just be stuck with that friendship."
"It doesn't help... I get it, you know. Why you were happier. I didn't mean to make it a whole thing where you had to chose between me and Suga but I kind of did. In my head, I guess? I'm sorry." He shouldn't have done it but he had been young and sulky. "Also don't call me that. I'm so done with Hobi and his nicknames. He keeps calling me Joon-ah. Or Jooniebug. And he wants me to call him uncle Hobi!"
"I'd have liked to spend more time with you. As Suga. I think I could have pulled it off if I'd sold it to you more." Yoongi shrugged. It was too late now. "I call you Joon-ah. You want me to stop that too?"
Although he had to smirk, he couldn't help it. "Jooniebug is adorable." He had to give it to Hobi, the guy had excellent taste in nicknames. "Don't let it get to you, just laugh with him. Makes it easier. Always best to go along with Hobi."
"I don't mind when you call me Joon-ah. I do mind if you start calling me Jooniebug though. Just fyi." He would kill him in his sleep for enabling that shit. Namjoon rolled his eyes and then smiled at Yoongi, reaching out to look at his transformer and press some of the buttons. How neat.
"I-- I should rest now, the meds make me really sleepy but... we can talk later?"
"Yeah." Yoongi nodded his head. "Maybe next time I visit, I can bring Jungkook." Mostly he wanted Namjoon to know that he'd visit again and to believe it this time. Also he really wanted to curl up next to Namjoon and hold him, make sure he was safe and then sleep next to him.
But, well. He had things to do. "Feel better, Joon-ah."
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He shrugged and nodded his head. "Sure. You can meet Jungkook. He'll be glad to find out I have friends."
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"You know, your dad had his reasons. I'm sure he cared... he was holding them back, I know he was. We both know what your dad can do in a torture session. He played nice." And yet, it was still painful.
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It was very loud and ... mixed.
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And that was all Namjoon wanted too. "I wanted that freedom."
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Yoongi smiled a little. "Puberty on the Streets, huh?" He had tried, though he probably hadn't tried hard enough. Namjoon had been so stubborn. Had hated that he had to leave, had hated that Yoongi enjoyed so much of the experience and had resented his friends. "If it helps, he's not going to get to be with me again. You, however, might just be stuck with that friendship."
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And he was like a few years older, if that!
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Although he had to smirk, he couldn't help it. "Jooniebug is adorable." He had to give it to Hobi, the guy had excellent taste in nicknames. "Don't let it get to you, just laugh with him. Makes it easier. Always best to go along with Hobi."
In his experience, anyway.
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"I-- I should rest now, the meds make me really sleepy but... we can talk later?"
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But, well. He had things to do. "Feel better, Joon-ah."